Gender Roles and the Fertility Crisis
Average number of children born to a woman in her lifetime, 2024.
“The feminine is the energy of life itself. The masculine is the structure that tries to hold it.”
The roles of men and women have undergone a seismic shift in the last 50 years. Women’s emancipation, especially since the 1960s, has led to profound social changes, but these changes have brought unexpected consequences. Among the most striking is the decline in fertility rates - a crisis that is most visible in the West, Japan, and South Korea. Governments, in a desperate attempt to reverse the trend, have offered incentives to encourage childbearing, none of which have borne any fruit. So, what’s really driving this demographic collapse? The answer, I believe, lies in two interconnected forces: one economic, the other psychological.
The Economic Shift: The Unintended Consequences of Emancipation
The 1960s marked a pivotal moment when women gained control over their reproductive health through the contraceptive pill. With the power to control when and if they had children, women entered the workforce en masse. This was, on the surface, a triumph - women gained financial independence, and society evolved to reflect a more egalitarian reality. But this victory came with a hidden cost.
As more women joined the workforce, the economic structure shifted. While western governments revelled in the one trick pony economic boost that doubling the workforce achieved, house prices and rents began to assume dual incomes in every household, and inflation followed. No longer was it possible to sustain a family on a single paycheque. In fact, it has now become an economic necessity for both partners to work. The dream of one parent staying home to raise children is, for many, no longer achievable.
“Having children has become something of a flex in modern society.”
And yet even with both parents working full time, many still can never afford to have children, or only find that their ability to procreate is greatly diminished by the time that they can. Having children has, in fact, become something of a flex of modern society. For the ones that are lucky enough to be able to afford it, a new reality emerges: children having to be raised (if they are raised at all) not by their parents, but by nannies and via daycare programmes. This shift has led to a sharp decline in birth rates, and an even steeper decline in children having full-time access to a parent.
The Psychological Shift: The Crisis of Masculinity and Femininity
But the crisis extends beyond economics. At its core, it’s also a psychological problem - one that concerns the delicate balance between masculine and feminine energy. Sexual attraction thrives on polarity: masculine energy attracts feminine energy, and vice versa. This attraction isn’t just about biology - it’s a dynamic that transcends gender, as we see in same-sex relationships, where individuals still embody these opposing energies.
But something has shifted. Women’s newfound financial independence has blurred the lines of sexual polarity. With the traditional masculine role of financial provider rendered less necessary, many men are finding themselves adrift, struggling where to situate themselves in this new world. The modern man is no longer needed to provide economic security, but this has left him confused about what his role should be in relationships.
Women, on the other hand, have developed new expectations. They no longer want a partner solely for financial support; they seek emotional strength, care, and support in building a household. This is where the tension begins. Despite being financially independent, women still often desire partners who are accomplished, driven, and successful - men who who are not only holding their own financially, but who they can look up to and learn from, draw strength from, and admire. And, unlike men, they are generally happier to withdraw altogether from romantic relationships rather than compromise on their standards.
This dynamic creates a serious problem: if women only want men who match or surpass them in career success, what happens to the bottom half of the male population? The answer is clear: they become marginalised, retreating into online subcultures like those espoused by the toxic masculinity of Andrew Tate or the conservative nostalgia of Jordan Peterson. These men, frustrated by the changing landscape of relationships, find solace in misogynistic ideologies that offer them a sense of control and purpose.
The Way Forward
This tension between men and women is complex challenge. Women’s emancipation, a remarkable victory for equality, has given rise to new expectations that men are struggling to meet. The traditional masculine role of financial provider is no longer enough; men need to evolve, becoming more emotionally intelligent and capable of offering the support modern relationships demand. Women, too, must consider embracing the idea of “marrying down” - something men have done for centuries - and accept a partner who may not exceed them in income or status, but who offers the emotional strength and companionship they seek.
On the economic front, solutions must also be found to alleviate the pressures that discourage having children. We need policies that prioritise affordable housing, support for working parents, and financial incentives for families. Only when economic stability is within reach for both partners can we even hope to reverse the fertility crisis.
If both sexes fail to meet in the middle, and economic burdens remain unaddressed, fertility rates will continue to plummet, and with it, the future of our civilisation. The hope is that as we navigate this social revolution, we’ll find a way to reconnect and rebuild our drive for intimacy, connection, and family. The alternative is, unfortunately, drawing blanks.